Who doesn't have something to say?

My posts are kind of random and might not make sense (and I'm okay with that). It's pretty obvious I'm not a good writer, hehe. But, I do have a lot on my mind and lots to say. I also do have random thoughts and ideas. I mean, who doesn't have something to say? Nobody is thoughtless.

Everyone always has something to say, even if you're the quietest of people. I've always been a really shy and quiet person but I've always had things on my mind I always want to say out loud but haven't been able to. I'm one of those people that is afraid of what people might say or think about my words and/or actions. In the last year or so, I've really been trying to work on it and get rid of that fear I have. I've also been working on loving myself for who I am and trying not to be someone I'm not. I'm done trying to fit in with people. I mean, come on, I'm 28 years old now, not in high school. I have 2 little girls, I'm supposed to be an example for them, not trying to grow with them.

I feel like I have a lot of love and inspiration to give. I feel like a completely vibrant, loving, happy, giving, caring, funny, weird, crazy person on the inside but I feel like I portray something else on the outside and I'm not giving all I have to give. I see no reason to keep it all inside. I've recently felt like I need to really find myself and I'm getting to know myself a little each day by paying attention to what I like, dislike, enjoy, what my strengths and weaknesses are, etc. I've spent most of my life by myself but without purpose, only hiding from everything and everyone around me. No more hiding. There is always a purpose to every little thing I say and do. I know that my life is not only about me, it's about everyone around me.

Sometimes we let the world around us decide how we live. There's things like money, love, negative influences, etc. We shouldn't let this happen. We need to enjoy life for what it is, plus more. Embrace the good and the bad. Enjoy the good and learn from the bad so that when the good comes again, it will be even better! Life can be so damn hard at times and I let it get to me- but I do know that things always get better in the end.

A little advice I have given myself:

No matter where you end up, it will always end up just the way it should. Your mistakes make you
who you are, you learn and grow with each choice you make. Everything is worth it, say how you feel, always be you, and be okay with it.